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What men really want in a woman: top 6 things

There are certain qualities in a woman that cause a man to take notice, to pay attention to that woman and want to get her know her on a deeper level. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but a true and lasting beauty, the one that will keep an authentic man falling in love with you over and over, are the radiant embodiment of the qualities we are going to talk about in this article.

A superficial man is like a magpie, always attracted by something that is shiny and new, until something else comes along and steals their attention and them away. An authentic man however is different, he’s not content with just the veneer or the fancy packaging, and he wants to discover your depths. He wants style and substance, a vibrant and living woman, not a hollow and empty doll. He wants a partner whose qualities compliment him and inspire them both to become the best they can possibly be.

Here then, in no particular order, are those qualities that once awakened will get the right man to sit up and pay attention to you. It’s no coincidence that the most iconic female role models in history have clearly had these qualities in abundance!

  1. Independence

An authentic man is one who is on his life’s journey, he’s walking his path and following his vision, the real woman who can embrace such a man has to also value her independence. A real woman will not make a man the sole object or motivation of her life, she will still have her own purpose and goals in life. A strong man needs a strong woman. Contrary to some popular myths that men seek weaker women they can dominate the reality is very different. A strong man is not intimidated by a powerful or successful woman, he is actually more likely to be inspired by such a woman, as it is said, “behind every powerful man, there is an even more powerful woman.” However, it is also important to note that neither should a woman (or man) be so independent that the space for the relationship is ignored and both will ensure that they are present with each other when together.

Indeed it is spoken about in Tantra that a couple are two, strong and independent people who consciously choose to be together because the result of their union, emotionally, erotically, spiritually etc., far exceed what is possible for them as individuals or with less compatible partners. In such a way independence and working on your own goals and self-development, allows a constant source of renewed energy to enter into a relationship and this helps keep the love fresh and vibrant. The independent woman allows a new her to be discovered in her depths by the authentic man who is committed to exploring these magical and mysterious depths of her soul.

  1. Emotional Maturity

An authentic man is tender, compassionate and understanding of a woman and her emotions, but a woman who does not take ownership of her emotions and who instead is more likely to project her emotions and needs solely onto her partner will be too needy, too lacking independence to attract an authentic man and deep relationship.

An emotionally mature woman will not create a drama over the littlest of things, she will not blame or criticise but will share her emotions in an honest and genuine way, being unafraid to express her vulnerability because she trusts her partner to embrace her in his masculine strength, tenderness and awareness. Neither will she be emotionally cold or aloof to her partner’s needs and will know how to nurture and support her partner in his difficult moments. A woman who is too emotionally dependent on her partner or too emotionally distant will not be attractive to an authentic man.

  1. Playful and Humorous

One of the great gifts a woman has is her natural and playful nature, it’s a great antidote for stopping men taking life or situations too seriously. Men love to be active and often have their eye on the goal and can get a bit single focused sometimes. The playful and natural humour of a woman stops a man taking himself too seriously, helps him relax and also keeps his feet firmly on the ground. Essentially this natural resonance with the “game of life” and the energy of “Lila” – the divine play of life – is helping a man keep a perspective on life and to realise that no matter how big or important his things seem, there is something much grander and mysterious at work in the universe. The spontaneous playfulness, radiant smile and enchanting laughter of a woman have the magical effect of lifting a man from the hum-drum of the material world into another realm of mystery and fascination of the feminine nature.

  1. Intelligent and Stimulating

An authentic man will always be attracted to a woman who can stimulate his mind. Indeed, it is said that the mind is the largest erogenous zone of a man (or woman), so if you want to get the attention of an authentic man then make sure you keep him stimulated. An authentic man is not afraid of an educated and intelligent woman who has opinions and thoughts, in fact he wants to know your thoughts, to be challenged and stimulated by an intellectual equal, such things help him expand his horizons and keep a healthy dynamic and rapport in a relationship.

It’s a big turn off if the only things that are interesting for you are fashion, gossip or the latest episode of a reality TV show. It’s also a turn off if your opinions are rigid and dogmatic and you are not prepared to allow yourself to be challenged and stimulated by the man’s mind. Authentic men want depth, a partner who is interested in improving things, understanding the world around her, has a richness of experience and is sharing them with her partner in an open and stimulating way.

  1. Loving and Affectionate

If you want to engage his heart and gain access to his heart and his emotional depths then you need to be a radiant beacon of love and affection. A woman who radiates warmth from her heart, who is loving, kind, compassionate and caring, a woman who makes small gestures, for no apparent reason, will always attract an authentic man. It is part of her feminine mystery, her magical charm and innate capacity to nurture and care about all that is in Creation, her resonance with the Divine Mother, the goddess that leads a man towards his own true essence.

This is one of the greatest strengths of a woman and how she leads and guides with love and compassion. It does not “molly-coddle” or overly indulge in any neediness, neither is it cold and aloof nor rejecting her partner’s affective needs. An authentic man is not attracted to an “ice queen”, but neither will he be attracted to the suffocating mother type.

  1. Embraces her Femininity

You want that authentic man? That man who is fully manifesting all his harmonious, masculine energies? If you want to attract a man who has stepped fully into his masculine power then you have to step into the fullness of your feminine power.

Fundamentally, a woman who embraces her femininity, or as is spoken about in Oriental wisdom, has fully awoken the power of Shakti, has already mastered all the other aspects we previously spoke about in this article. She is the Mother, the Initiator, the Fascinator, the Heroine and the harmonious, sensual and enchanting manifestation of this energy creates an irresistible force of attraction for an authentic man. She has that certain “Je ne sais quoi”.

There is a lot of confusion, rejection or denigration of the feminine energies in modern society and this has led to a lot of women refusing to embrace the fullness of their feminine powers and instead live in the “shadow” – there are many reasons for this that we will cover in later articles.

This is the kind of woman that is strong and confident in her feminine energies, she does not use them to manipulate or control others, and neither does she hide them away where none can see them. She is beautiful, she is sensual, she is sexy, she is bold, she is confident. She is what every authentic man wants, because a relationship with her promises fulfilment of body, mind and soul, and the gifts to awaken both partners to their full potential.

Such a woman will always be met with admiration, adoration and an overwhelming love.

As a wise man once said, “If you want to find your Prince Charming, then you need to become the Princess he will find completely irresistible.”

And surely my dear readers, this is an ideal that both men and women should be aspiring to as the promise of happy and fulfilling relationships is something that everyone longs for.



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